Addlepated Dumba**es

That would be Kurt and myself. We have had the most unbelievable weekend. Seriously. We survived Friday the 13th just fine. Saturday the 14th however.....good grief!

Friday night we went to Northwestern Iowa for a graduation party and then to stay over night at Kurt's parents. It's about 3 hours from here. (As a side note, Kurt has been sick with a horrible cold all week AND he hasn't had much sleep because of that and work.) Anyway back to the point. Kurt's parents have retired to South Dakota and are in the process of moving. We borrowed my Dad's truck (and left my car at their house along with my dog.) The plan was to collect the car and the dog Saturday afternoon once we got back from Kurt's parents. WAS of course is the operative word in that statement.

Also we had to be home to pick up the kids by 1pm on Saturday afternoon.

So anyway (there are going to be a lot of those in this entry). We left Friday afternoon and drove to Fenton. There is A LOT of water between here and there. Normally there is not. They've had 8 in of rain in the past few days. Water was lapping at both sides of the highway in many spots. The reason we took the truck was to bring back a queen size bed. The truck is a stick shift. I can drive stick shifts. I just don't do it often nor do I do it in traffic. People felt the need to pull out in front of us all weekend. Stuff was flying everywhere. One guy didn't receive a piece of my mind (and it would have been COLORFUL) merely because Kurt was on the phone with a client.

We got to his parents alive, we went to the party, we ate a lot, and met (at least for me) lots of relatives for the first time. I only got called by his ex wife's name once. So that was nice. Kurt's two brothers, their wives, and their 5 kids (ranging from ages 17 to 3), and the two of us were all staying at his parents' house. Which is great, but as I mentioned, his parents are in the process of moving, so there are 2 beds left in the house. Airmattresses all around. Kurt and I decided the closer you sleep to the ground the more you have to pee. It was a long night.

Saturday morning rolls around. Kurt was still sick. He doesn't think clearly when he is sick. We loaded the bed, removed a chandelier from Grandma's house, and I dug up plants. The boys loaded the bed and his parent's big screen TV. Of course the best method for removing these things from the house was to go out the window. I missed most of that process luckily. I was getting covered in mud as I attempted to wrestle what I believe was a sedum from the ground. The move was causing high stress in the house. Kurt and I needed to leave by 9:30. We were out of there by 10:30 so I thought we were doing great. I forgot a tarp but we had a drop cloth we strapped down. It looked like rain all the way home. It rained a couple of times. There were 40mph winds with bigger gusts. The plastic was about to blow off, so Kurt ripped it off. I dropped my diet coke on the floor filling my shoes with soda. People again tried to kill us in Ft Dodge. Kurt yelled at the stupid *@#&**#*#ers. We called the kids and told them we'd be a little late.

We get to Dike (with in 1/2 hour of home). Kurt asks if I put the laptop in the truck. What? NO. Great. It's his work computer. We call his parents. We arrange to meet one of his nephews on their way back to Rochester. That is going to add 4 hours to the trip. No problem. I call my parents and ask them to bring the truck and the dog to us to save driving. I will go fetch the computer and Kurt will take his car and get the kids. We drive another 20 minutes. Medicine Head says to no one in particular "the keys to the car are in the laptop bag". No problem we have a spare, I think. Next statement is "the spare is in there too, I think". Great. We can't fit the kids in the truck, my car is at the farm, the Impala keys are somewhere between here and Minnesota, and the tranny is out of the Wonder Twins suburban. Maybe we can borrow his Maxima to get the kids. He calls his sister in law about the pick up arrangements. We're going to meet them in Mason City which i think is about 1.5 to 1.75 hours away. We get home. The Maxima is gone. No luck. Call the kids tell them we are having vehicle problems. We use the bathroom and head north. Put another tank of gas in the truck. We get down the road about an hour and I remember my parents. Crap. I get the machine. I hope they haven't left for our house. Oh well. We arrive in Mason City, put another tank of gas in the truck and head for home. By the time we get home it's 430. Kurt heads down to get the kids. I start making supper (hoping the kids have had lunch) and clean out our room to make way for the new bed. As I move furniture in the living room. I find the spare keys to Kurt's car. Joy. I call my parents, tell them we are home. Mom says we need a travel planner.

Kurt and the kids get home. They get the bed moved in. My parents and the dog arrive. They stay for supper. Mom and I are looking at pictures on the digital camera. She sees a "Risky Business" type shot of Kurt. I was laughing so hard I was crying. Kurt and I are exhausted. Mom and Dad get ready to take the truck home. Yep. That's right. We've lost the keys. Kurt says "I put them on the hook". They're not on the hook. He keeps saying it. They aren't there. Then he decides he put them on the table in the garage on this picture we got from grandma's house. It's of the Pope. " I put them on the Pope. I know I put them on the Pope." I said, "5 minutes ago you insisted you put them on the hook." Mom and Dad are shaking their heads at us and laughing. Mom has a key to the truck. I had no idea. They leave. Kurt and I are going to bed. The kids will have to fend for themselves. We walk in the house and I find the truck keys. We are a bunch of addlepated dumba**es.